Dishonored - A Pokémon/Gundam Wing Crossover
by Freakachu
Summary: Okay, Wufei goes crazy after Heero runs over Ash with the car =) You are all dishonored if you don't read this!


Dishonored - A Pokémon/Gundam Wing Crossover

Written by Arti Cuno and Freakachu

This contains the REAL story behind the trashing of Misty's bike... =)

Though all in all we shared all the way though, it's just to show who was typing at the time =)

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ARTI:

"Weren't we supposed to take a left back there? back at Tenbucktwo?" Duo asked, scratching his head, looking at a road map. The braided gundam pilot looked dumbfounded.

"No no, it was a right at, uh, someplace...." he corrected himself, turning the map around a few times.

"You moron, we were supposed to go past there the left at-" Wufei began only to be cut off.

"No, it's right, Now! NOW!!" Quatre yelled from behind Duo, looking at the map over his shoulder.

Heero, who was stuck driving the group, gritted his teeth as he clenched the steering wheel tighter, this would be the last time he offered to do the driving on a road trip.

The only one that hadn't said anything yet had been Trowa. he was sitting in the back seat, in the middle, being squished by Wufei and Quatre. The more lost they seemed to get, the more chaotic the group in the car became. Duo was sitting in the passenger's side in front, still flipping the map about. "emoC modgniK?" Duo asked. "Oh!!! Wait... " he turned it around and flipped it around properly. "There, we're approaching Kingdom Come, funny name for a place, it's right next to Dead Man's Drop...."

Quatre looked worried. "Uh, I think we're lost, maybe we should pull off at the next exit and ask for directions...." he paused for a minute and sat back holding his stomach. "Actually, can we stop soon, please, I'm gonna hurl..." he was changing to a nice shade of green.

Trowa's eyes popped open wide and wandered to Quatre's direction, he moved slightly to Wufei's side of the car and kept a watchful eye on the sick blond.

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FREAKACHU  
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"Aim that way!" Duo pointed toward Trowa. 

He looked at the map.

"Hey, now we're approaching some place called Pallet Town. Talk about weird names." He muttered to himself.

Suddenly a two headed bird shot out from the pushes, Heero swerved only to smash into the poor bastard and flatten it, dead.

Wurfei snorted, then muttered under his breath "You Drive like a woman..."

"You read that map like a WOMAN!" He reaches over Trowa and leaned forward to snatch the map out of Duo's hands. He then proceeded to create an origami piece of some sort. It started taking shape as a bag, which he handed to Quatre to throw up in.

Quatre looked at the map-bag, and looked outside at the down pour and became even greener.

"Hey! That was the only map you baka!" Duo turned around to retrieve the map, the exact same second Quatre decided to lose his lunch.

Heero looked disgusted, but then started to laugh when he noticed that Duo was covered with Quatre's previous meal.

"You puke like a WOMAN!" Wufei replied predictably. He leaned over the seat in front of him, which happened to be Heero's drivers seat and yelled in his ear. 

"And YOU, like I said, YOU drive like a WOMAN!" Heero jumped, surprised, and the wheel jerked violently, causing him lose control on the slippery, wet road and crash into something, or someone...

A yellow rodent like creature hit the window with a splat, and as the car came to a stop, the thing jumped up and electrocuted the car, frying everyone inside.

"See?" Choked Wufei, his hair sticking up, "You DO drive just like a woman."

Everyone in the car was singed badly, and hair was sticking up on end like they had stuck their fingers in a light socket. All except Trowa, who's hair was currently on fire. The styling products he used on his hair in huge amounts had caught fire, because after all, hairspray is flammable.

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ARTI  
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"Do you smell something?" Duo asked. "Smells like someone's smoking...."

"You SMOKE like a-"

"WOMAN! We know!" Duo screamed, turning about in his seat. He looked at Trowa. He didn't seem to have noticed the fact his hair was on fire, all the hair spray and other things made such a nice helmet he didn't seem to be able to tell. "Trowa, you're on fire..." Duo pointed out calmly.

Trowa proceeded to look into the rear view window and see, in fact, he WAS on fire. He reached over Quatre forgetting he was sick, flung the door open and kicking the blond out the door as he went in a mad rush out to find something to put out the raging inferno.

"When the fire starts to burn, there's a lesson you should learn..." Duo sang, trying to remember what to do. "Something, something you will see, you'll avoid catastrophe." he paused. "DAMN! Forgot the important part...."

"Well, Trowa, "something, something"." Heero instructed, mocking Duo's memory.

Trowa began to run in circle, beating his arms about like a chicken with his head cut off. Unfortunately, he didn't see the "dead body" on the ground, the thing that Heero had hit, and tripped over it, falling to the ground. He began to roll about trying to put out the fire.

"You ran over a WOM- no wait, is not a woman..." Wufei corrected himself kicking the body. "It seems to be a rather stupid young boy. With a yellow rat..."

"Pika!" the rat yelled, sparks coming from its cheeks. Wufei kicked at the animal telling it to shoo. The angry animal let off an electric charge, charring the oriental pilot more then he'd already been.

"Huh? Wha'?" the "stupid young boy" asked, confused as he began to stand, stepping on someone who was trying to beat the flames off his air and throwing dirt on the fire.

"Get out!!!" Trowa hollered, the fire finally staring to die down.

"Who are you?!" the stupid kid yelped, looking around at everyone there. "Pikachu!" he yelled, picking up the half dead yellow rodent fallen at his side. "Pikachu? What did they DO to you?"

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He then noticed the car that was there.

"What did they do to ME?!" He looked around for something and yelled like a maniac.

"Oh damn! I was supposed to give this bike back to that girl!" The black haired boy jumped to his feet and pulled a squished and charred (from pikachu's thundershock to the car) bike out from in front of the vehicle.

Quatre leapt to his feet after being pushed from the car by Trowa and squealed like a little girl. 

"THE CAR IS ON FIRE!" He hollered.

Everyone turned to look, and sure enough, Trowa's hair had caught the interior of the car on fire.

Wufei flopped indian-style on the ground and yelled into the sky.

"Quatre, You squeal like a WOMAN!"

Heero glared at Wufei. He was getting sick of this.

"Yeah, well you COMPLAIN like a WOMAN!" He snapped at him, mocking his face and voice almost perfect.

The Chinese boy took offence.

"You not call ME a WOMAN! That is DISHONOR! DISHONOR ON YOU, DISHONOR ON YOUR FAMILY," He waved his hand toward the flaming automobile, "AND DISHONOR ON YOUR CAR! Oh, wait, your car dishonored itself..."

He then turned toward the car.

"HOW DARE YOU CALL YOURSELF A CAR?! YOU HAVE DISGRACED YOURSELF BY CATCHING AFLAME! PASSENGER SIDE AIR BAGS, BAH! YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE DRIVERS SIDE AIRBAGS!" The car seemed to become enraged and the fire popped in his face, "DON'T YOU SNAP AT ME!"

He stalked over to Heero.

"YOU disgraced yourself by buying a FORD!"

Through all this, the dark haired boy just sat and looked dumbfounded at Trowa.

"GARY?!" He quesclamated, staring wide eyed at Trowa. "What happened to you?"

Trowa looked confused, and in pain. The fire had, in fact affected him after all. 

"Gary? Who's that?"

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ARTI  
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"You too have disgraced yourself!" Wufei continued ranting, point to Trowa. "You have not only caught your hair afire but yet you have burned that hell's creation once known as a car before it dishonored itself and now it is only to be known as a piece of shit! BUT WAIT! It was a piece of shit long before that, before it dishonored itself, or more, you..."

Everyone began to tune out Wufei's womanly ranting. "Obviously this car is a WOMAN, like you ALL must be, you're all disgraceful..."

"Gary's my rival! You're my rival! Uh, aren't you?" the black haired boy asked, scratching his head. "Right?" He looked baffled.

Trowa looked back and forth. "He's talking to me?" he asked, Duo and Quatre shrugged.

"...NO! You ALL disgraced the car, Quatre for PUKING INTO IT LIKE A WOMAN, DUO for READING THE MAP LIKE A _WOMAN_! Trowa for SETTING IT AFIRE... LIKE A _**WOMAN**_!!!!! Heero, for DRIVING IT _**LIKE A WOMAN**_! NO! But wait!! ..."

"Yeah you... Uh, I guess you're not..." the confused boy looked at Wufei. "Is he okay? Did you break him out of the loony bin just now? Is that why you were going so fast?"

Heero nodded. "Yeah.. We should take him back, right? Which way is it?"

"..THE CAR WAS DISGRACED LONG BEFORE!! ONCE IT HIT THE FACTORY LINE. NO! BEFORE!! BEFORE THAT! WHEN THE COMPANY BOUGHT THE METAL!!! Which means the car has DISGRACED YOU ALL!!! No, You were long before then disgraced, this car, I mean piece of shit. For it is only a 99 Ford, PIECE OF _**SHIT**_!!!... And you are all even bigger pieces of SHIT!"

"Uh, it's to the south, you drove OFF the island? Wow, that's odd, one of them cool new hover cars?"

"NO!! Is NOT a "cool hover car" IS A WORTHLESS PIECE OF FORD SHIT!!!"

Wufei kicked the flaming car, immediately catching himself on fire. He looked down to his flaming foot. "NO! This disgraceful thing has DISHONORED ME! IT HAS DISGRACE MY FOOT!!! REMOVE YOURSELF FROM ME, FOOT!"

"Er, I guess I should tell you my name, but I dunno if I should with someone like him around, he might start stalking me and kill me... Or steal my pokémon! Hey, You'd better not be pokémon thieves!!!"

The boy clutched the electric yellow rat he called Pikachu. "You leave Pikachu alone!" the rat shocked him for picking him up.

"What would we want with THAT thing?" Duo asked, laughing. He was soon fried again as the rat shocked him. "Forget I said that...." he coughed out a puff of smoke, then falling to the ground.

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Wufei began violently kicking his foot about, trying to break it off his leg.

Duo began laughing, and started singing.

"Everybody was kung foot fighting!" 

Quatre didn't seem to be sick anymore, and started giggling.

Everyone except Wufei, who was still attempting to remove his "dishonored" foot. gathered around the boy with the weird mouse. Duo poked at it, only to get snapped at by sharp teeth.

"Feisty little bugger!" He pulled his hand back. "Anyway, what's your name kid?"

The boy put the animal on the ground and stood as straight as he could, trying to make himself look taller.

"I'm Ash Ketchum! From the town of Pallet!" He exclaimed.

Trowa looked confused. "Pallet?"

An uncomfortable expression passed over Heero's face. "Uhh... heh, you were too busy trying not to get barfed on.to notice .that's where I, uh..."

"Where he ran over that two headed bird!" Duo yelled excitedly.

Ash nodded, wide eyed. "You hit a doduo?"

Duo looked over at Ash at the mention of something that sounded like his name. 

"Do-Duo? Um, Heero may be a bad driver, but how could he have hit me, when I was in the car with the rest of them?"

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ARTI  
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"No, A doduo.. the name of the bird..." Ash said, stupidly. "Your name is Doduo? That's cool, I guess."

Duo grunted. "I'm not a DO DUO, I'm a Duo! Er, I AM DUO."

"He is a PIECE OF DISHONORABLE SHIT! Just like this car! and this map!"he pointed to the puke-soaked map on the ground still folded into a bag. "AND MOST OF ALL THIS FOOT!!" He glared at his foot. "REMOVE YOURSELF, DUMB SHIT!"

"That's fine and dandy but what about this bike?" Ash pointed to the charred and dismembered bike laying in a crumple. "I'm gonna be dead if that red headed girl sees this! Since YOU ran me over don't you think you should explain it to her and pay? I can't, I'm only 10, I can't pay for it!"

"I ain't paying." Heero mutter.

"Me either...." Duo added, watching Trowa picking over his hair, watching his reflection in a puddle.

"IT'S OUT!! I HAVE WON!!" Wufei exclaimed, looking at his foot. "It has been re-honor now!" he bowed to his foot.

"Now that's just plan frigged up...." Duo laughed nervously. "You hear that?"

Everyone stopped to listen, other then Trowa who was too engrossed in his hair being burned to a crisp. "It's the cops!" Heero yelled, "Take cover!"

The five gundam pilots all dove for cover behind the bushes, all behind the same small bush, fighting with each other who was to sit where, it finally ended with Quatre and Duo sitting on Wufei and Heero while Trowa went into a tree. Unlike the others he had sense enough to move.

A woman came in on a motorcycle with a siren on it, she had blueish hair and was in a uniform that could be considered a police uniform... or not... Duo was the first to see her as he peeked though the bushes. "Whoa, it's a chick!" he exclaimed.

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He bounced up and down on Wufei's lap, and started to act, well, gay.

"My, those clothes are just so, old fashioned! And that hair! It's worse than Trowa's!"

All of a sudden, a branch dropped out of the tree Trowa was hiding in, hitting Duo in the head and knocking him out, unconscious. Although, still sitting on Wufei who seemed less than thrilled about having someone "disgraceful" perched on him.

"You have disgraced my clothes.. I must remove them immediately!" He raged.

"No! That's quite alright!" Heero tried to calm Wufei down. But when Wufei realized that it was indeed a female police officer, he jumped up, flinging Duo off him, and screeched. "SHE HAS DISHONORED HERSELF FOR BEING A _**WOMAN**_!"

He stood, gritting his teeth, while the blue haired officer interrogated Ash, and offered to take him and his pokémon to the nearest center. Wufei had thought he had beat the fire out, but apparently it decided to come back for a visit. His shoe ignited once more, and he stood staring at it dumbly for a few seconds while it flickered. He was just about to yell something to the fire about "dishonoring" him again, but in a flash, the fire consumed him in one second. His eyes bugged out, and he began running around like a racing inferno. The bushes began to blaze, and soon he had all the others on fire as well, with the exception of Trowa in the tree, and Duo, who had rolled unconsciously down a hill and into a mud puddle.

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ARTI  
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Wufei made a break for the puddle the unconscious Duo laid in, and belly flopped into it as a last ditch attempt to end the blaze. Duo jerked awake as he was plastered with mud and water, turning him totally brown. "You look like shit!!" Wufei cackled, unaware he did to. "You're a piece of SHIT like that dishonorable piece of shit from FORD!"

"You do too!" Duo yelled back, smashing him back into the puddle, face first. "1...2...3... And he's OUTTA HERE!... Finally..."

Duo picked up his fellow "piece of shit" and slung his over his shoulder. 

"Maybe we should be going home now..." Quatre pointed out. "We haven't gotten where we wanted to, I'm cold, wet, and sick, not to mention slightly charred. I wanna go home..."

He began to wail, Trowa slapped his hand over his mouth. "Stop wailing like-!" Trowa began to say.

"A WOMAN!" Heero, Duo and Trowa all yelled, scaring Quatre nearly to death.

"Well, let's start hitch hiking...." Duo yawned, "Been a long da- hey! there's someone already!!"

Duo flagged down the incoming car, a red convertible, with a group of girls and one guy with spiky brown hair who resembled Trowa, or who WOULD have before Trowa had managed to have his hair singed off. The boy sneered at em and laughed at the ragged group. "What happened to YOU guys?"

"We ran into some boy with a funky electric spewing rat." Duo explained. "Him and his rat zapped our car after we flattened em, but before that we plastered a bird to the road, was a dumbdodo or something like that...."

"You mean a DODUO," he boy correct. "Some pokémon trainer's you'll all be, heh, guy someone should be studying me, you look about 20 something each, kinda OLD to be so stupid when it comes to pokémon."

Heero grabbed the kid by the collar of his shirt and threw him out of the car onto the ground. "We're in need of this more then you."

The five pilots piled into the car, Duo driving this time, as they kicked out the cheerleaders. "Here's your whores, kid." duo smirked, kicking the last one out as he put on a pair of shades and sped off spinning up a pile of muck at the kid and the girls.


End file.
